We have come to the final piece of the puzzle of Sarah Walker. The most important piece of who Sarah Walker was becoming under the tutelage of Chuck, and his family. In this final chapter, we will explore the desire for a home for Sarah, and Chuck providing the very place she never had. A home for herself was just as important as seeking normalcy.
The Price for Intimacy
In Chuck vs The Imported Hard Salami We learn what was going on in the heart of Sarah Walker. Whether it was the thought of death or just a passionate kiss, Sarah’s feelings for Chuck were on full display in this episode, and for the first time Agent Walker was losing the battle. The kiss was a lot more than just passion between two people. The kiss was a sign of something she wanted to do for a long time. Her last moment alive was going to be kissing her “Cover” boyfriend.
The moment also showed how much the cover was killing her. She has been with this man, who she had begun teaching her how to live life. A breathe of fresh air if you will. Its the very reason she gave a reaction not like a cover girlfriend.
Chuck can’t see the expression, but Lou can and the fact is Sarah was struggling with the cover. I have mentioned many times in other articles about expressions. Notice how she is looking directly at Lou with an expression of not being alright with this whole arrangement. She doesn’t want to be in the van, she wants to be with Chuck. Duty often has played a role in her life, but this is different this is woman having the inexperience of not understanding the feelings she was dealing with.
One thing is for sure everyone can tell what she was going through, and much to her protest, she was torn. The fact that Lou was able to kiss him, and be intimate with him was not something Sarah knew how to handle. This is why you show up at a “Cover” sleepover dressed like she was in Chuck vs The Truth. She knew what she was doing. Lou can’t compete with her and Sarah wanted to remind Chuck of this fact. Remind him of what he has in front of him.
The scene in Chuck’s bedroom is something we need to look at. This is her first time in Chuck’s room and it was not going to plan for her. Chuck called her out on the outfit, and everything went downhill from there. Throw in Ellie bursting into the room, and Sarah first night in Chuck room was an utter failure,
Inexperience will do that. especially when you are lying to yourself about the whole thing. She claimed we have to take this serious in very Agent Walker tone, and the words cover ramble out of her mouth. She was afraid of what she was seeing. Candles and music were on display, and Chuck was in full romantic mode. She enjoyed it when she entered the room because she had a smile on, but once in and the thought of Casey listening in Agent Walker took over.
Intimacy was something Sarah was seeking, After dealing with Lou having her claws in Chuck, and maintaining professionalism. Sarah’s heart caved when the opportunity presented itself to her. The kiss is not a spur of the moment type kiss. Its a kiss that has been fueling for days and months. A kiss that Sarah wanted in front of the fountain in Chuck vs Tango
or was hoping for before break up number one.
Passion comes when you least expect it. What you see from Sarah before the kiss is a woman who wanted that moment with Chuck. The kiss was of passion built on desire. The desire to share a bed and being with the man she has begun falling for. An assignment that meant more to her than just work.
When the next time comes around at the chance of being in bed with Chuck, it is smoother for her, but not for him. However, She still had to deal with another woman, in the form of an ex. The words “Cover” girlfriend came out of the mouth of Chuck, and unbeknown to him, Sarah heard it. Sarah heard it twice. First, Chuck said “She kissed me, no covers and no lies.” it was a blow to Sarah because for the first time Chuck expressed his dismay for it. Especially when its an ex, who knew the real ChuckNo Covers and No Lies, and much like earlier in Season 2, when Chuck said “You will Never be normal.” It was a shocking development. It is clear from this scene they don’t talk to each other, which will be a problem for both of them throughout the series. Again, expression has power over words or silence in this case. How can a woman with no experience cope with this latest experience, She dealt with it better the second time around but it is still a struggle.
Sarah went about her business as usual way. She went along with Chuck’s latest flame. Chuck makes the save again along with Jill, and we have a moment between the too that rekindled a relationship between the two. However, watching from a distance is Sarah Walker. She is forced to watch it unfold, and for Sarah its beginning to affect her again. All she wanted was a chance for what Jill was doing and be intimate with Chuck, but the Job and other women get in the way of that chance.
What I find interesting in Chuck vs the Ex comes at the end of the episode. At this point, we have seen Casey doing the surveillance of Chuck. Whether it be listening in on phone calls or watching from a camera.
This time around however its Sarah, who is listening and we get a glimpse of Sarah worried about Jill being back in the picture. Sarah Walker was listening because Jill is a threat and she knew this, which is what brought out more of the fire within Sarah.
The words “cover girlfriend” struck Sarah pretty hard, The very reason in the next episode we see a new Sarah Walker, We get a look from her that she has not shown, and its worth looking at .
Her jealous becomes visible more for Casey to make a comment
Sarah Walker: You’re not concerned to involve a civilian in a covert government investigation?
John Casey: Ah, the girl’s personal knowledge of Guy LaFleur makes her of use to us. You’re sure your not just jealous Bartowski’s found himself a new piece of asset?
Watching Chuck and Jill was ripping Sarah apart, its the longing for the intimacy she is witnessing, and the truth is the kiss from long ago was the foundation of this. The kiss that she was able to do again and enjoyed even more. The second time around the kiss was not under pressurized conditions, but the feelings were both the same. Roan Montgomery knew the kiss was filled with real none spy emotions.
Sarah was in heaven as he clutched her face. Intimacy is strong when both are willing partners. The very reason Sarah has a look of displeasure when watching Chuck and Jill, its her passion inside for Chuck that makes the superspy jealous with envy.
Intimacy can come at time of chaotic moments. Some are by design and others are forced upon. A Christmas present turned into an ugly situation. A weekend in the suburbs went from a morning breakfast to a reality. When the feelings are rightm but both know what they are doing could lead to trouble, sometimes that doesn’t stop Chuck from expressing his desire for her, and she returned the favor in the suburbs, but before she does major circumstances cause a rift between the two.
Chuck’s lack of experience in her world became apparent, when Sarah killed Mauser in protecting Chuck and his family. Chuck goes off on a tantrum. She lied to protect him. Sound familiar? I think back to his reaction to Sarah’s relationship with Bryce Larkin, despite this they had an intimate moment.
Intimate moments find themselves even in hashing things out. When the Mauser shooting was bothering him, Sarah tried to pry it out of him. She is not in Agent walker form because she is being normal about it. Chuck and Sarah engage in an intimate real life conversation. She knew something was bothering her, and willing to talk things out. It is a very different Sarah from the first time he accused her. She was in Agent mode in Chuck vs the Helicopter. They still were expressing their feelings when the Jill Saga concluded. Communications works wonders when you do it right. Jealousy ran its ugly head because there was none. Sarah should of been up front that dating his ex was bothering her. The kissing and flirting was getting to her, Chuck should of told her that Bryce bothered him rather than sulk.
Sarah Walker has been able to handle the worse criminals in the world, and not blink an eye. She had been able to adapt when she learned her father was going to be in prison, but nothing in life prepared her for real life situations. In her heart, She is in love, and in her mind she has to be Agent Walker. Intimacy with another woman is one thing, but its now with someone he knew, and most importantly broke his heart before. She was worried two fold here. Her boyfriend was with another woman, and what she might do to him, but for Mr. Bartowski Sarah found out something about Jill that would change everything in her favor again.
Jill was working for Fulcrum. but she still has maintain her Agent Walker Persona, she is his handler after all. However, it is very hard. The eyes say it all for me, She is scared because the desire inside of her wants to kiss him, but Agent Walker stopped her because not even a superspy can resist the need for intimacy. People need to understand how hard it is for someone that wants someone so bad that it hurts, and the fact that she has a job to do makes it that much harder. She had the taste of kissing him twice. Especially the time lapse between the two kisses She wants his lips as she puckered up. but work had to be done.
Intimacy works in mysterious ways sometimes, a test run if you will. After Jill and the Mauser situation things between the two begin to get even more complicated. Chuck struggling between real life and what it takes to accomplish a mission. Sarah doesn’t understand the difference between a cover and being a real girlfriend. One day in the suburbs will change all that.
Before we get to the mission, lets take a look at the beginning of Chuck vs the Suburbs. Sarah comes looking for Chuck and asked him about Valentine’s Day. In bit of a role reversal, Sarah is the one acting on feelings. She is basically asking Chuck out and a chance for intimacy, but everything is supposed to be a cover right?
Since Christmas things have change, he is not acting like the charming Chuck she knew because he has accepted there relationship as it was. Its Sarah is not looking for a cover. Her face expression is of amazement, but its not here that tells the whole story.
Chuck was playing video games when there was a beautiful woman sitting next to him. She kept trying to get his attention. but nothing is working. A chance at real intimacy is going by the waste side, and this time its Chuck who is acting like an agent would. Sarah does not like it one bit. It comes back to lack of communication, She should of told him it was a real date, but she didn’t, which leads me to this
No Casey, No Beckman to intervene just her and Chuck. A dream she has been waiting for, and she is happy. It may be just breakfast to some, but for someone who is in love, its the simple things like cooking for that person which brought her alive. Chuck has her heart now, and she took the opportunity to give a glimpse of whats to come.
Chuck Bartowski: Are you enjoying this who Martha Stewart thing? I can’t even believe it. Please tell me you’re not going soft on me.
Sarah Walker: Just shut up and eat your breakfast.
Chuck Bartowski: You better be careful, Sarah. One day you might actually turn into a real girl.
It was a mission, but Sarah was in the moment. She was in a home and with the man she loved. She can play wife for a little bit and enjoyed it. Chuck also enjoyed it until he was forced to break his “fake” wedding vows. Again, Chuck struggling with the concept of a cover for a mission. Sometimes you wonder if they were playing cat and mouse at times.
What I would also like to take a look at three scenes that contribute to the relationship. The first one comes after Chuck was forced to download the Fulcrum Intersect, there is fear in her eyes. Has Chuck been lost to her. She is worried because losing him would destroy her.
Another form of Intimacy, can come at a time of need. No kissing or touching, but of a need of each other. Sarah needed Chuck there and he delivered. He protected her. However, sometimes good deeds need to be taken in contexts. Sarah reminded Chuck the house was just for a mission. The words struck Chuck hard, and would lead to the third break up.
However, whatever the case may be for Chuck, Sarah was still living the dream. The dream of a home and family was taken from her. What I like about this scene its shows emotion from Sarah. Agent Walker was also into this mission. The thought of a home does wonders sometimes. Even for someone who has never had one. What was also nice about the scene was Sarah’s expression before she left the house.
Another expression Chuck never gets to see. a long list of these missed opportunities for clarity. A intimate moment between the two again spoiled. A straight line for a third break up.
People often claim Sarah never spoke up about her feelings, but sometimes she did without directly saying her feelings. Remember Chuck was still an asset and her feelings was in violation of protocol, which was a concept missed by many people who watch the show. Sarah want to be with Chuck, but couldn’t because of her role as a handler. Alex forrest was how Sarah was supposed to be with Chuck, but Sarah’s feelings often were the driving force in protecting him.
If it was all a cover and feelings were not there than you don’t give the kind of expression after being told we need to break up, a third time in two years. I can understand Chuck’s frustration too. He is in love too, but he was never told about the rules of the agency. Sometimes he seemed like he didn’t want too, but after a failed house experiment Chuck said he was done.
Ellie Bartowski: Well, what happened what went wrong?
Chuck Bartowski: I guess something that’s been wrong from the start. You know?
Ellie Bartowski: Are… you guys aren’t breaking up, are you?
Chuck Bartowski: No, no, no, no, no. Trust me. Sarah’s not going anywhere.
Ellie Bartowski: Chuck, I guess I – I don’t – I don’t know what you’re saying exactly.
Chuck Bartowski: Look El, I know how much you love Sarah. And I know how much you love the idea of us, and us moving forward with you and Devon, but we’re not anything like you guys.
Ellie Bartowski: But you guys seem so perfect.
Chuck Bartowski: Yeah, I know. I guess, but being in that house with her, it was so close to being perfect. The way I had pictured it would be. Then I realized what was wrong with that picture… And it was us. Sarah and I are never going to be anything more than we are now. But you know what? I’m okay with that
He was done alright because he didn’t even want to answer her call. However, Sarah was watching and picked up on the break up vibe.
Two years of being with Chuck, she knew what was going to happen, but unlike before she didn’t want to break up. She wanted to let things be. The difference is the relationship had become deeper by then , and for Sarah she iwas tired of trying to iron things out and this time speaks up about it.
Her expression is of frustration. Chuck’s constant “I want to break up speech.” was running its course with her, and she was going to make a point when meeting Cole. She said “Sometimes a woman wants a man to act on his feelings rather than talk about them.” While she was saying it, her eyes slightly glance in Chuck’s direction. She knew he was listening in, but she doesn’t cheat on her cover boyfriend right.
Sarah at this end of Chuck vs the Beefcake was beginning to understand the cover was not working, and when she said it was a torture for him, she was also admitting to herself it was bothering her too. When it comes to intimacy sometimes even the brief of conversations can spark a moment,
When two people love each other, but are reluctant dancer partners. communication becomes secondary. Trying to say the right thing or walking on egg shells to protect each other often leads to more lies.
Sarah is reluctant because of the job and Chuck, while he admits he is ready was still not able to grasp that she was into him despite the Intersect in his brain. Inexperience in both worlds ultimately is what keeps them apart.
Cole getting captured set up another opportunity for Sarah to be intimate with Chuck. They were forced to rekindle the “Cover” relationship because of the capture, and Sarah instructed they need to move in together. Sarah this time around is not the nervous one. Its him. I find this scene to be funny because of Chuck’s facial expressions.
Its not sexual like the third time around, but its all the same. Sarah was wearing Chuck’s t’shirt and is laying very close to him. She is comfortable, yet Chuck was freaked out. What was even more funny was how he reacted to her sleeping in her panties. It was supposed to be this way in Chuck vs The Truth, but this time we have a more mature couple. Sarah comfortable in her skin.
Sometime sex does not have to be the only form of intimacy. Most married couples will tell you that your not having sex every night, and just sleeping together was sufficient. Sarah was able to kiss him and now had a test run in sleeping with him. The result was pure happiness. When she jumps out of bed, it was like she had a great night of sex. It shows you how long she has been wanting to share a bed with him.
The fact he respected her and didn’t take advantage also helped his cause, but it was clear he was freaked out while she was in heaven.
Sarah will some day call his apartment home, but for one night she would settle for one night to sleep with him. It erased the whole suburbs debacle because she was able to be intimate with him. She claimed they would find an apartment with separate rooms, but after watching this episode one would assume she would not be sleeping alone very often. She would use protocol excuses to find her way next to him.
Lets jump to the next time they are in bed together, which needs a little time to analyze. For some Barstow was a magical moment for Charah. They just went on the run to find Chuck’s dad. Sarah and Chuck shared a hotel room together. Lets begin with the night before,
She has no problem wearing just panties around him. A tell that a woman is comfortable with a man, and we are definitely passed Day 564 because we get a Sarah now that went against the agency. She is close to being ready to commit to Chuck. The third time in bed with Chuck leads them to have an intimate conversation, which shows you were the relationship was at this point.
I like this moment because it showed Sarah and Chuck talking and being a real couple. Sometimes couples need to get away from every day life and it brings two people together, which Chuck vs the Colonel did. At this point, this is the closest we get to them acting on their feelings.
Again we see a happy Sarah, and talking with him was comforting. They are both relaxed and where they want to be. No covers or lies here a true intimate moment. Love is supposed to work this way, when its real. Fears of being bunkered or fired is not on her mind nor is he thinking that he is inadequate for her.
Its moments like this that really shine when it comes to Sarah’s need for Chuck. In the beginning, she would of never went against the agency. She would of not slept with him, and most importantly she would of not spooned with him.
Lets back track now, remember the first kiss, awkward and tension. Same thing with the first sleep over, but as time went on and the closer they became sleeping together became a synch . She was comfortable with him, and he was sleeping too. she has her hand on his and there is a cover in a shape of a blanket nothing more.
We also get a passionate moment, but something I am glad didn’t happen. The truth is they still were not ready here. She was still thinking like a spy at times and before the castle scene. She was still not sure if having sex would of been wise,
its great to see things like this. Especially with what the two of them have been through. Break ups and misunderstandings. Not here there was no misunderstanding here. They want each other,but the timing was not quite there.
Chuck Bartowski: For whatever it’s worth, if I have to spend the rest of my days in a dark windowless room, I can’t think of a better person to spend it with.
Sarah Walker: Not really how this works.
Chuck Bartowski: What? We can’t request a cozy little two-bed two-bath cell?
Sarah Walker: Two-bed?
What stands out about this scene was the verbal communication from Sarah, She was starting to talk like a real girlfriend. What was the need for two beds after what they almost did in the morning. It makes the hotel scene that more special. Sarah Walker wanted to continue down the path they were on. A real relationship was on the horizon. but like most things on Chuck there would have to be one more test and for the purpose of this article, we wont discuss Prague here. This is more about intimacy between Chuck and Sarah. How Intimacy is best suited for a home of their own.
We will fast forward to the final piece of the puzzle, and that is the relationship itself. I am one that prefered the will they, wont they but there is a few episodes that I love about the relationship. It made me appreciate the journey more when watching.
Communication and Intimacy Have its Rewards
After talking about the effect one Kiss and one terrible sleep over, we have come to the conclusion of this series. We will now talk how once communication and intimacy became one both Sarah and Chuck became one. Lets begin,
In Chuck Vs The Final Exam, we get the start of expressing each other’s feelings. Starting with the first part of the exam. When communicating we have to remember the difference between both characters. Sarah does not express her feelings through word of mouth, she showed it through body language and expressions. Chuck was the total opposite. However, when both are able to use their form of communication the scene is in harmony.
Passion is still in her eyes and he expresses his desire for her, which starts the whole ball rolling again.
I have always said, she was with Shaw, but her heart will always belong to Chuck. There is no mistaken here. She was in a relationship with Shaw, but was willing to kiss the love of her life. It was a very positive sign.
The expression of wanting intimacy overcame her. She wanted to be able to kiss him, but once again the job a mission was in the way. They really needed to get past that hurdle.
We get to the most important lines from Chuck, when he told her he loved her, but she heard it through a recording. This scene was different and holds a lot of water. Communication has its reward when you are straightforward. For me the best scene with the right music happened in Chuck vs the Final Exam, In My Sleep was the perfect choice for Sarah’s mindset. She still dreamed of being with Chuck and having a normal life, but once she thought he pulled the trigger in killing the mole. crush her dream for the time being. However, Chuck would prevail with the help of the Ring.
Sarah Walker: The final part of your mission is to kill him.
Chuck Bartowski: Are you being serious right now? Are you kidding me? Kill him here? Now? I can’t do that!
Sarah Walker: Then you won’t become a spy.
Chuck Bartowski: But then… we couldn’t…
Sarah Walker: No. Probably not.
Chuck Bartowski: Sarah, when all this started, I didn’t think I had a chance of ever becoming a real spy. But if – if I can’t do this then – then -then what’ll I be?
Sarah Walker: Then you’ll be Chuck, and there’s nothing wrong with that... That’s all I can say. I’m sorry. The rest is your decision.
Its a tough dialogue, but they are communicating still. They are going about it slowly, but its still in a forward process. She said “You’ll be Chuck, and there’s nothing wrong with that.” and she heard for the first time how he felt.
Communication at the right time sometimes breaks the ice. Chuck opens up finally and this time he’s not talking about a vacation.
Chuck Bartowski: Look, I don’t want to pester you Sarah. Or become some – some nuisance you can’t avoid. I’ve seen Morgan go that route far too many times to count. And since I’ve already given the fancy eloquent version of this speech before, I’m going to be blunt and honest: I love you… One more time because it feels really nice to say, I love you. I feel like I’ve been bottling this up forever. I love you.
Breakthrough and one step closer, A kiss that triggered this journey from three years ago was set to have its reward, but we only need Sarah to get over the fear of expressing herself and she did.
Chuck asked the question that was eluding the both of them. One that was tough but had to be asked, and we have the sealing of a journey worth taking .
Chuck Bartowski: But earlier on in my… drunken haze… I realzed I hadn’t asked you a really important question. I’d like to ask you now if that’s okay. Just once for the record… Sarah, do you love me?
What the entire Chuck universe has been waiting to hear, drum roll please.
Sarah Walker: Yes.
Chuck Bartowski: I should probably put some pants on.
Sarah Walker: No, Chuck… Yes.
Chuck Bartowski: What?… uh, What?
Sarah Walker: Chuck, I fell for you a long *long* time ago. After you fixed my phone, and before you started diffusing bombs with viruses. So, yes.
Sarah Walker: Yes.
We have the communication part done. She told him she fell for him a long time ago, All we have left intimacy and a home, they were seeking in Barstow and finally she can have her dream of being with Chuck and having a home.
After Chuck stopped Shaw from killing Sarah, they took a hiatus from work and everyone they know. They wanted to be together and were afraid once back home, it would be over. They both agreed they could not go back to the way things use to be. They finally had sex and were in a relationship. The issue now was how to tell everyone. especially Beckman.
They both tell Casey and Morgan what they want, but it was neither of them that made sense, it was Juan Diego that made the most sense.
Juan Diego Arnaldo: May I just say,I’ve been on the run for 2 years. And no matter how far you run you can never run from yourself. And from what I’ve heard from *both* of you, it’s not what either of you wants.
Once back home it was time to tell the boss about the relationship.
However, Beckman has a surprise for them as well.
Sarah Walker: General, Chuck and I are dating… exclusively.
General Beckman: I must caution you that allowing your private life to *interfere* with your professional one can be dangerous. But off the record, it’s about damn time!
After Beckman’s kind words, everything was clear. No lies, no covers, no 49Bs, no bunkering, the only piece of the puzzle left would be for her to move in and she won’t have to wait too long, before we get there lets take a look at a scene that is an iconic moment in the series and where dreams come together. Chuck in love with a beautiful superspy and Sarah in love with a nerd from a retail store. Dreams come together when intimacy and communication are in sync. The result is simple.
After sharing a bed together, and becoming an official couple. One thing remained. A home of her own. She no longer need the hotel room. She was staying most nights at Chucks’ apartment. Chuck asked her to move in.
At first she was against it, she said “Why do we need to pretend we are a real couple, I didn’t mean it like that that I love working with and being with you why mess with a good thing.”
Everything she has wanted was staring at her, and her inexperience in getting what she wanted freaked her out. The tough spy freaked out by a simple question. The dream of a home is so close
After dealing with the Turners, things came into perspective for Sarah. She was in love with Chuck, and the chemistry and feelings they have for each other was developed over time. She finds Chuck in Ellie’s apartment and said the words that will change everything for Charah,
She said” I was hoping we could start with our place.”
Chuck: Our place?
Sarah: “That’s if your offer for me to move in still stands.”
From here on out Sarah will have a home. She no longer needed to worry where she was staying. Chuck’s apartment was hers too, and Sarah in her new home, opens up to her boyfriend,
Sarah Walker: I’m sorry that I freaked out when you asked me to move in with you. It’s just, you know how I grew up. I spent my life living in hotel rooms under fake names. I’ve been trained to survive a thousand different situations in the field. But nobody ever taught me how to live a normal life.
Chuck Bartowski: Well, I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think we’re ever going to live a normal life.
Sarah Walker: Well, I’d like to have something to fall back on when my spy life is over.
She moved in, she has a boyfriend and the only thing that can wrap this story up. Is her visit to Dr. Dreyfus’s house and rather than put photos. I will just end the story with four emotional scenes that still makes me choke up. Sarah Walker expresses her love emotionally and verbally. These are the kind of scenes that made Yvonne Strahovski so popular with Chuck fans.